Tuesday, March 19, 2013

3/19/13 – I'm Back

Wow, it has been a long time since I have blogged.  I apologize that I has taken me so long to get back to this.  I have had just about a rough of a 9 months as someone can have without dealing with a death.  I normally try not to get too personal here on the blog.  My aim is to keep the focus getting "excited and creating things" as Wil Wheaton would say.  But I do want to share with you a little bit of what has been going on and more importantly how I'm dealing with things.  I hope that some of the advice and strategies that I have been using can help you deal with whatever is going on in your life.  I have always said that due to our limited prospective as human that in a very real way the worse problem in the world is whatever the worst problem you are personally dealing with. 

But don't worry, this post will not be all doom and gloom.  I have recovered enough to start knitting again and I have actually finished some things.  I have a scarf I dreamt up that I made for my mom as birthday gift.  In a little bit I show you some pictures and teach you how I made it.  It's super easy.

So a little background on what has been going on.  First off late last spring early last summer my Dad was diagnosed with Lymphoma.  Luckily they don't live to far from Philadelphia, so he was able to go to the Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania for treatment and see some of the leading authorities of Lymphoma.  He had a number of Chemo treatment and it was very stressful on the whole family.  It was a terrifying process with diagnosis and treatment, but the more we learned the easier it was to handle.  Not knowing what is going on is the hardest part of anything like this.  With a few bumps (and Hospital stays) along the way the Chemo went well.  After that he did a month's worth of Radiation treatments to get any stray Cancer cell.  This also went well and in fact just finished up a few weeks back.  The only bump in the road from that was the day after he finished he came down with pneumonia, spending almost a week in the hospital.  The good news is that he out of the hospital and doing well.  Now we just have to wait and see how successful the treatment where.  With the type of Lymphoma he had we should know in about six months if it worked or not, and the way you know is if it comes back. 

In a way this makes the next six months the hardest part.  Once we found out what we're dealing with and my Dad got into treatment, we were being proactive.  But now we just have to wait and hope.  It's the helplessness that really eats at you.  That and the knowledge if it does come back, the success rate of the treatment options go way down.

The next float in our parade of challenges came in august   I was in a car accident.  I talk about this a bit before so I won't go into too many details as to what happened.  Basically a drunk driver rear-ended me half a dozen times, causing injuries to my shoulders and the spine in my neck.  I Have going from being in excruciating pain and barley able to do anything, to just a fair amount of pain and able to do most normal things around the house.  However even sitting a typing from more than an hour is still difficult.  I'm on my second round of Physical Therapy, but I'm hoping to be back to normal in a month or two.

This brings us to the day of hurricane Sandy.  I don't know if you have ever tried to make an appointment with a Gastroentonlogus, which I know is misspelled, but MS Word doesn't know what I mean to write and at this point I'm tired of fighting it.  Anyway, if you have been to one you will know that it takes forever to schedule appointment with this particular type of specialist.  I had been having some pain and nausea after eating and the doctor wanted to an endoscopy.  It just so happened that was scheduled for the same day the hurricane hit.  Luckily the hurricane did hit us in the Philly region till around 1 or 2 in the afternoon and my test was set for 10am.  They were able to do the test and get me home by 12:30.  Unfortunately they found that I have evidence of gastritis and a bleeding ulcer.  Now I have to take a pill an hour before I eat, which is a big pain in the ass.

One more minor issue, I have been having issue with knee pain when I go up and down stairs.  Told my new doctor (my old one quit about 3 months ago, and no it wasn't because of me) and she ordered some X-rays.  The X-rays showed that I have some slight joint narrowing.  The fix for which is more Physical Therapy, after which I believe I will have put in just about enough time to get a degree in Physical Therapy.

Beside those all those things the last nine months has seen the following financial challenges:
  •  Christmas, two family member birthdays being in December and my anniversary being Jan 2nd.
  •  Increasing oil prices
  •  Over $500 in repairs bill for my heating system which is oil base and also provides me with hot water 
  •   Increases in the cost of my medical insurance and co-pays
  •  Multiple car repairs, including one caused by Car Sense putting in a new thermostat backwards (luckily I found a great new mechanic and never need to use Car Sense for repairs again)
Finally to top it all of my relationship with Laura end three weeks ago.  I'm not going to go into all of the how's and why's.  It is no else is business and really unimportant to the purpose of this story.  I will say Laura is an amazing person and a fantastic artist, if you have never seen her art, click on her name and it will take you to her website.  Anyway back to me, the dissolution of the relationship was very upsetting and was the finally straw.  I need to do something.  So I talked to people, I called a ton of friends and let them hear my sob stories and that helped to various degrees, but I did get some very good advice.  My friend Becky, who is one of the smartest and kindest people I know, told me to make sure that every day I looked for something good that happened that day.  To actively seek out the good thing, even if it something as small as traffic to work wasn't as bad as the day before.  I know that sounds silly but it really did help.  The good thing for today was that I got a bunch of writing done at lunch and after work.

The other thing that I have done is to make exercise a top priority.  I have committed to getting at least 30min of cardiovascular exercise every weekday.  I have placed this commitment before everything else, if I late to work because of it so be it.  And IT has helped a great deal.  Back in collage I had psychology professor who was also a practicing psychiatrist.  She told us that in all here years of treating patients the single most effective antidepressant she had ever seen was regular cardiovascular exercise.  It was the first this she proscribed any patients with depression.  Even if it doesn't help the depression, the patient was getting healthier, so it's a win/win.   

Another thing I have done is applying for a loan to get a new heat system that uses natural.  The reason I say that is there are a number of government programs that one can use to help one's self.  This one is run by the state.  I was turned down the first time I applied.  I didn't just that no for an answer and found out why I was turned down.  I then took steps to fix the issue that caused me to be turned down and reapplied.  It looks like this time will be a win and I hopefully will have a new system in place by the end of the month.

Being creative has also help a great deal.  I have done a fair amount of knitting which has the benefit for being both creative and relaxing.  The things I'm making for the most part are for me, which is a nice and need change.  I'll be posting the things I make here, just don't expect them too soon, I'm still learning.  I also have been writing a fair amount.  I hope to have some of it finish and published soon.  Being creative has always been a good outlet for me and when I'm not making something I just feel off.

Finally, writing this all out has helps some.  It's nice to just enumerate everything that is going on, put it down in words and say I'm having a tough time of things.  It helps me not feel so guilty about feeling depressed.  I do in fact have things that are depressing going on.  I felt bad about feeling bad and it became the snaking eating its own tail.  Posting this hopeful will help me break the particular cycle.

All that being said, I still have a long way to go.  I spend more time than not being depressed.  My life has moved in a new and completely unpredictable direction, a direction that has yet to even fully taken shape.  That fact of the matter is that I need to talk to someone professional about everything.  I just need to find out how to afford it.


Now if your still reading or if you skipped down to the picture (and who can blame you) on to the fun part.  Here you can see the scarf I made my mom for her birthday.  It mainly garter stitch with a bit of flourish at the ends.  She has a brown jacket so the terracotta yarn will match it well.  Here are the steps to make one:


  1. Cast on 32 stitches
  2. Work in garter stitch for 2 inches
  3. Start Ribbing with Knit 1 then Purl 2. Knit 2, to the last stitch which to you knit.  Then reverse that and start with a purl.  Repeat this for about an inch.
  4. Work in garter stitch till you have it about three inches form where you wanted it
  5. Repeat step 3
  6. Work in garter stitch for 2 inches
  7.  Bind off

And there you have it.  I know that my directions are not in the normal terminology of patterns you can find in book, but I'm still new at knitting.

I have also knitted something for my sister for her birthday, but she hasn't gotten it yet.  I'll post it when I know she has received it.

OK, enough belly aching.  Now that I'm single I will need to find someone to cook for because even with all the biking at the gym, I'll get nice and fat if I eat all the stuff I plan to cook.  So if you know me in real life, come on over and I'll try out a new recipe on you.

Till next time, get the hell out of my kitchen.

Oh and one more piece of advice from RuPaul "if you can't love yourself, how the hell you going to love anyone else"

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